Are My Kids American?

With all the talk about getting rid of birthright citizenship, I wonder about my family's future. Not long after we moved from Germany, we had a son, our youngest child. Our understanding is that he was automatically American. Now, we're not so sure.

For a long time, I've felt like a Republican because they seem to be the most American party. They love America the most and are most willing to defend her and the American way from the rest of the world. Now, I'm not so sure. If the Republican Party wants to take away the citizenship of my youngest child, then I can't be a Republican.

In the worst case scenario, Donald Trump becomes president and my youngest son is no longer an American. My husband, myself and my two oldest kids, who were born in Germany became naturalized American citizens on July 4th, 2013. How more American can you get? My youngest son would be deported. He's only seven and speaks German like a slightly retarded little kid. He doesn't know any German playground songs. He's a vegetarian. How is he going to survive? Because he'll have been in the country illegally, he won't be able to return for something like 10 years. How is that going to work? My two oldest kids can't stand Germany, which is mostly the fault of my relatives who, honestly are one of the main reasons I wanted to come to America. The oldest, likes that he can drink beer there legally, which I admit is a plus.

If the worst happens, we won't tell him that he can't comeback. We'll put smiles on our faces and wish him a wonderful vacation.

Russia and Russians

There are a few Russian grocery stores near where I live. When I first moved to the US, I was very surprised by this. I thought that Americans didn't like Russians. You don't see many Russian restaurants, at least not around where I live. I went to Coney Island once and it was all Russian. It's right at the Atlantic Ocean so maybe they don't feel comfortable further inland. Personally, I don't feel comfortable so close to the water, so I guess we're even.

If there are no Russian restaurants it must be because either people don't want to eat Russian food, which I can understand, or people do want to eat Russian food but prefer to make it at home. Home cooked meals are more nutritious, so I can understand that.

I don't like Russian food because it is too heavy. When you spend most of your day stretching and posing in heavy spandex, you don't want to be too full and you don't want to have a Babuschka belly, if you know what I mean. My daughter once told me I look fat. I was mortified, but it was true. I'd been eating too much pizza. We have a couple of really good pizzerias near where we live. I've now since cut back and my belly is gone. It also helps to wear a girdle. If you get a good one, and I'm talking some major bucks, you can even where it under your spandex and nobody will know, even you.